House Shoes

254

By Sarah Mansheim

Managing Editor • Mountain Messenger

 

I don’t mean to toot my own horn, but I really am the smartest woman I know. Every now and then, I’m just moseying along, one foot in front of the other, and then, BOOM! Inspiration.
I am, as my husband would say, an “idea guy.” That means that, quite frankly, I am all inspiration and no perspiration. My favorite thing in the world is to lie down and daydream, thinking up all of the wonderful things I, or Tom, or my kids, or the world, should do to make life easier/wealthier/healthier.
“I’m going to stop eating meat!” I declare.
“I’m giving up sugar!” I say.
“CrossFit is my life!” I lie. (Being that I am all inspiration and no perspiration – sweat really messes up my hair – my ideal exercise would be described as “the yoga of lying down.”)
“Let’s get a woodstove! Let’s get a new car! Let’s move to town! Let’s go to Mexico!”
I’m telling you, I’m freaking brilliant.
Luckily for Tom and the girls, I never actually change anything other than my clothes (that’s not entirely true, I do switch back and forth between red and white wine as the seasons change). But there, dear reader, in the sartorial changes, lies the reason for this post.
I’m wearing slippers at work.
Let that sink in.
Slippers. At work. Outside the snow is falling, and my dress boots, their soles damp from the sidewalk, are drying next to my space heater while I am sitting at my desk writing in my house shoes.
Why didn’t I ever think of this before?!
The truth is, I’ve never had a spare pair of slippers. Don’t get me wrong. I’ve got a fantastic pair of Ugg slippers at home. They are about six or so years old, stained with maple syrup and coffee, the side of one of them chewed up by a wayward puppy back in the day. They suit me. I love them, ugly as they are.
This Christmas, my sister-in-law gave me a pair of burgundy cable knit Dearfoam slippers.
“Thanks,” I managed, thinking that, as new and pretty as they were, they would be of absolutely no use to me. I resolved to drop them off at the Salvation Army in a few months (you’ve got to keep presents around for a while to assuage the guilt) and shoved them, unwrapped, back under the Christmas tree.
Fast forward to last week: I was back at work during that awkward space between Christmas and New Year’s, and I had worn my favorite pair of red pumps (I had a girls night out planned for the evening, and I needed my shoes to match my wine). Unfortunately, they were pinching and rubbing my toes; plus, it was a bit colder than I had realized when I got dressed that morning, so, when I kicked them off under my desk, my feet got cold.
Then it hit me: BOOM! Inspiration. What if I brought my new slippers to work?
Well, dear reader, I did. And it is brilliant. My feet are so cozy! Admittedly, I look a little funny, but newspaper editors are supposed to be eccentric, so I think it works for me.
Now I’m trying to figure out how else to make my office more homey. Perhaps I’ll install a fireplace, bring in a bathrobe.
I saw an article online that the treadmill desk trend is over. Now, it said, the latest invention is a lying-down desk. I saw a picture of it. It kind of looks like a dentist chair, complete with a tray upon which to place your laptop. I showed the picture to my boss, and said, “This is what I need.”
So far, he hasn’t gotten back to me on that.
I don’t know why. I can just picture it now: me, lying in repose in my housecoat and slippers, breaking news stories and firing off brilliant commentary as the fireplace crackles behind me.
Apparently, one of my predecessors here at the Mountain Messenger used to nap at work. If these slippers are any indication, I may soon be picking up the baton, just as soon as I get my desk.
I’ll let you know how that works out, but, first, let me just lean back and think about how I can make that happen.